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10种方法让你的孩子有一个无所畏惧的心态

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作为一个家长,你希望你的孩子成长为自信、快乐和成功的成年人,能够正面面对世界,充分利用每一个机会。但是,你能做些什么来帮助他们克服可能让他们退缩的恐惧呢?首先值得记住的是,恐惧是有目的的;它是一种自然的人类情感来警告我们可能的伤害——召唤行动来保护我们自己。然而,在我们的现代世界里,恐惧往往与风险不成比例,阻碍我们尽可能多地达到目标,并且有能力做到。
 
这里有10种方法可以帮助你的孩子培养一种无所畏惧的心态,克服那些阻碍他们的恐惧。
 
1。承认恐惧,不要放弃它
简单地告诉你的孩子不要害怕,或者停止愚蠢,这并不是帮助他们解决问题的有效方法。你需要正确地承认它。无论你怎么想恐惧,对他们来说都是真实的,他们需要知道你得到了。给他们机会谈谈,表明你真的理解。恐惧需要首先被承认,然后才能帮助他们从中继续前进。
 
2。让他们知道失败是一种选择
社会对每个人都施加这样的压力,不要失败,我们很容易忘记,失败往往是学习过程中的关键部分。历史上最伟大的发明大多是在最后一次成功的失败之前的一系列失败尝试的结果。不要让失败的恐惧阻碍你的孩子,让他们知道有时候失败是可以的,告诉他们如何才能从中吸取教训,以便下次做得更好。为他们塑造这种行为,如果你在某件事上失败了,向他们展示你是如何把它变成积极的。
 
三。不要把自己的恐惧传递给他们
这是我们大多数人都知道的,然而,作为父母,我们有时可能都犯了罪。现实地说,你可能永远无法完全把你的恐惧隐藏在你的孩子身上。然而,你能做的就是与他们交谈,让他们知道你是人,你也害怕一些你不必害怕的事情。向他们展示你是如何应对的,以及你是如何克服这些恐惧的。
 
4。帮助他们识别真正的恐惧
通常当人们表达恐惧时,他们实际上在谈论一些远离恐惧本身的东西——如果有人说他们害怕飞行,他们可能实际上并不害怕飞行,他们害怕坠毁。一个说他们害怕床下怪物的孩子实际上并不害怕怪物在床下,他们害怕他们从床下出来伤害他们。克服恐惧的一个重要步骤是明确指出真正的恐惧是什么,所以帮助他们做到这一点,然后共同努力解决它。
 
5。向他们展示好处
有时候,孩子会如此专注于恐惧,以至于他们看不见。通过与他们克服恐惧的好处,他们将获得什么,它可能导致什么。问他们一些问题,鼓励他们去思考积极的结果可能是什么,而不是仅仅告诉他们。这将有助于将他们的注意力重新集中到恐惧障碍的另一面。
 
6。提醒他们以前克服恐惧
提醒你的孩子在以前害怕尝试某事但最终享受它的时候,可以让他们对自己的能力有一点信心。


As a parent, you want your kids to grow up to be confident, happy, and successful adults, able to face the world head-on and make the most of every opportunity. But what can you do to help them overcome the fears that might hold them back? It’s worth remembering first that fear serves a purpose; it’s a natural human emotion to warn us of possible harm – a call to action to protect ourselves. However, in our modern world, fear often tends to be out of proportion to risk and can prevent us from achieving as much as we would like, and are capable of.

Here are 10 ways to help your kids develop a fearless mindset and overcome the fears that are holding them back.

1. Acknowledge the fear, don’t just dismiss it
Simply telling your child to not be afraid, or to stop being silly, isn’t an effective way to help them deal with it. You need to acknowledge it properly. Whatever you might think about the fear, it’s very real to them and they need to know that you get that. Give them the opportunity to talk about it, show that you really understand. The fear needs to be acknowledged first before you can help them to move on from it.

2. Let them know that failure IS an option
Society places such pressure on everyone not to fail, we can easily forget that failure is often a key part of the learning process. Most of the greatest inventions in history were the result of a long series of failed attempts before the final successful one was achieved. Don’t let fear of failure hold your kids back, let them know that it’s okay to fail sometimes, show them how they can learn from it in order to do better next time. Model this behavior for them, if you fail at something, show them how you turn it around into a positive.

3. Don’t pass your own fears onto them
This is one that most of us are aware of and yet, as parents, we’re probably all guilty of it at times. Realistically, you’re probably not going to be able to completely hide your fears from your kids at all times. What you can do however is talk it through with them, show them that you’re human, and you too are afraid of things that you don’t need to be afraid of at times. Show them how you deal with it and how you are working to overcome those fears.

4. Help them identify the actual fear
Often when people express a fear, they’re actually talking about something that is a step away from the fear itself – if someone says they’re afraid of flying, they’re probably not actually afraid of flying, they’re afraid of crashing. A child who says they’re afraid of monsters under the bed aren’t actually afraid of the monsters being under the bed, they’re afraid of them coming out from under the bed to hurt them. An important step in overcoming a fear is to clearly pinpoint what the actual fear is, so help them to do this and then work together to address it.

5. Show them the benefits
Sometimes a child can be so focused on the fear that they can’t see beyond it. Talk through the benefits of overcoming the fear with them, what they will gain, what it might lead on to. Ask them questions to encourage them to think of what the positive outcomes might be rather than just telling them. This will help to refocus their attention on to the other side of the fear barrier.

6. Remind them of previous times they overcame a fear
Reminding your child of a previous occasion where they were afraid to try something, but ended up enjoying it, can give them a little boost of confidence in their own abilities.

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